How To Feel Like A Princess in your own Skin

For the last two years, my body hasn’t really felt like home to me. I had a period of time when I was exercising and eating right but someway I completely lost all of that, and my body changed a lot. I’d always been pretty small- I was never completely skinny, genetics to thank, I’ve always been chunkier on my bottom half- but I was always quite small and light and just never had to think about weight or anything like that too much. 2016 was the last time I remember my body being that way, and I think January of this year is when I hit my heaviest. Over the last two years I steadily gained pound after pound, but because it wasn’t really translating into dress sizes, I didn’t really notice it. It did kind of slap me in the face late last year when I bought a dress in what I thought to be my regular size 4, and it came in the mail and I could just barely fit it over my head. It was quite the moment for me. My body gains and loses weight quite easily, and every late night Chinese food order and ice cream pint was coming home to roost. I hadn’t been taking care of myself, emotionally, mentally or physically, and it was showing in my body. January of this year was when I realized just how much weight I had put on, and made some kind of a decision to work at losing it.

I have come something of a way since January. I measure my weight by how my jeans fit, and I bought a pair in January that didn’t fit me when I got them, but now they do- are a bit big around my waist even. I’m keeping better track of what I’m eating and how I’m eating; I’m getting in decent exercise; I’m drinking a lot of water- I’m kind of making every day changes to lead me towards a better lifestyle that I can sustain, and have show in my body. Today, I put on an outfit and I felt like me again. I felt free in a way that I hadn’t in a while. I’m sorry this post is rambly but it’s really because this is me talking to myself about how I’m doing. Letting yourself go looks different on everyone- some people lose a ton of weight, some people gain; some people lose their drive, some people overwork themselves- I think the important part is giving yourself the space to realize what’s happening so you can make healthier choices to restore yourself. I’m really just trying to be a better me, and that translates into my body and that translates into how I feel and move through the world. I was really excited about these photos too because a few months ago, this skirt didn’t fit round my waist anymore- putting it on to realize it did again was low-key joyous. I made a video talking about dealing with insecurities and I’ll leave a link to that below.

I apologize again that this was sort of rambly, but I just wanted to talk about where I’ve been in terms of body confidence and how that’s even affected how I’ve been able to commit to this blog and my Instagram. I haven’t felt properly confident in a long time but I am regaining it. I hope you all find what you need to build your own confidence and comfort in your skin too.

As always, sending you love and light,

Amoafoa.